Friday, November 30, 2012

Attachments

When I love someone or something very deeply, I don't want to let go of them or for things to change.  As a boy, I remember how beautiful and pristine the mountains were, how relatively untouched by the encroachment of man, and how I wanted to keep that ineffable beauty in tact.  When the towns on the road to Granby, CO. started to grow and expand, specifically Winter Park and Frazier, and the trees were being cut down, large swaths of acres being developed for condominiums and houses, and the purity of this heavenly landscape was being stripped away, I remember how sad I felt and how I wished I could buy up all  the mountains from the state of Colorado so they couldn't develop and destroy its natural wonders.  As the development and expansion of the valley continued to grow and each year more buildings were erected, more trees were cut down, and the fish in the lake were getting smaller and smaller, I longed for the "purer" days of my youth and attached myself to those days as being "better."  I had a deep attachment to the past and to the memories I shared with my father.  How I wished to go back to those days!

If I could have a deep attachment to the landscape, because I didn't want it to change, imagine how deep my attachments are to the people in my life, past and present.  I love people.  I love my family very deeply.  And when I was together with my former fiance, I loved her very deeply.  Loving them is not the problem, nor should I stop loving as truly and as deeply as I do - my love is unconditional - it's been put to the test - but, it's true, it is.  I've learned that.  And know it.  My problem comes in the attachment I make with the people I love.  When things change, as they will inevitably do as things evolve and grow, I have had a hard time letting  go of the people who've played such an important part in my life.  A part of me refuses to accept that a period of my life is over, never to be recaptured, lost in the oblivion of past time and space, and the feelings and emotions I felt gone with them.  I reach back into the storehouse of my memories to connect to this person once again, re-living the golden memories we shared.  Unlike most people, I think, the way my mind works is I disregard or d energize the impact of the negative memories and look past them.  I've always felt when people show you their "dark" side, that's not who they truly are, it's just this blot on the screen, and who they are is beyond these defense mechanisms and ego constructions they've built around themselves.  (Note: I am in no way discounting the evil in the world.  There are evil people who do evil things and they should always be held accountable for their actions.  However, I believe these people have gone completely unconscious and lost total contact with the Source of their existence.  But this topic is for another blog.  My focus here is about attachments to persons, places, or things in our lives, past and present, that keep us down from living the lives we were meant to live and how we can break free from them).  I don't hold grudges or grievances very long, so it's hard to look at someone with hatred for long, or hold against them something they've done to me in the past.  It's just the way I am.  What I hold on to is the love we shared, the love that brought us together, the magical wonderful feelings we felt for one another or that we shared and expressed to each other, and I want to go back to that, and I wonder how did love not triumph?  How did we let the workings of the ego, the little hiccups and challenges destroy the love in the relationship that brought us all together?  Of course I understand now that love could never have been destroyed, I am love, and that love can never be taken away from anyone.

Anyway, my attachment around my partner, my family, and my idea about relationships is rooted and held firm because of my love for them, and my desire to be and have unconditional true love in my life.  For instance, I have a deep attachment to my family.  The love I have for them is unconditional.  They can do just about anything, and I won't stop loving them.  When things are great for them, my heart is light, my day's are better, I'm happier; yet when things are bad with any one of them, I commiserate and sympathize with the problems in their lives, and unconsciously attach to their pain, making it my own, and suffer along with them.  I add their issues onto my issues, which just adds more weight to my heart and spirit.  When you take on other people's problems which are not your own, you take away from them their own power to solve the issues by themselves, and create a form of the co-dependent relationship.  They are dependent upon you to solve their problems for them (at least partly), they attach themselves to you as the source of their solutions, and defer to you to make the decisions for them.  This often happens in families because of the deep bonds we have for one another.  Our happiness is dependent upon whether they live up to our expectations, and when they don't, this brings up anger, resentment, and feelings of not being appreciated or loved.  "If he loves me, than he'll do this..." or "if she loves me, she'll do this.." is a familiar pattern in families because of our attachment to our fathers, mothers, sisters and brothers and what we think is best for them.  Unfortunately, this is not allowing them to be who they are and accepting them completely.

As I've become more consciously aware of who I am and what my purpose is, and what loving unconditionally truly means, I've also learned that to love someone unconditionally implies the word non-attachment, to the results or outcomes that come about from all my relationships.  My family, for instance, gets to choose how they want to live their lives.  I can't be attached to the "hoped for" outcome that I perceive I want for them, if that's not what they want.  What I want for them is to be happy and filled with love, joy, and peace.  Attaching to what that looks like for them or how this might manifest, would only cause me pain if, for whatever reason, it does not come about, or is delayed for a time, or does not fit in to my idea of what would make them happy.  I must and do recognize that every single member of my family is on their own journey, they are wonderful, incredibly loving people, and I have to be there for them as a son or brother who only wants the best for them, and who loves them truly and unconditionally.  At the same time, I must withhold attachment to the results or outcomes.  I must love them so much to allow them the freedom to find their way without my interference or judgment.  

Until recently, the troubles of my parents and siblings over the years has brought me great pain, consternation, frustration, anger, disgust, and exasperation at the futility to make positive, concrete change in the movement and manifestations of their lives.  My family's drama (and we all have it, or most of us do anyway) has affected every area of my life, kept me prisoner to the extreme vacillations between joy and despair, because I allowed it to have its grip on me.  Why?  Because of my attachment to them and the outcome of their lives.  Where does this attachment come from?  From the deep love I have for each one of them.  I have confused what unconditional love means, and made it to include suffering along with them or because of them, and thus, I have allowed myself to be at the mercy of their unconscious and conscious behavior and actions, which had brought me suffering because I felt helpless to affect positive change to their situations.  Now that I am practicing non-attachment to the outcomes yet still remaining a participant and influence in their lives, I'm seeing the benefits in my own life, health, and inner happiness.  Plus, I have made a personal reunion with God as the source of my life, and this has made all the difference in the world.

Another person with whom I formed a deep attachment to was with my former girlfriend and fiance.  I was deeply, deeply attached to her, so much so that the thoughts running through her head became my thoughts.  My idea of true love, true unconditional love with a partner, is to unite with them at the deepest levels of the heart, mind, body, and soul.  The mystical union of two people - however, when two people are sick, this union becomes toxic, and if you're looking for someone outside of yourself to fill the perceived lack you think you have - in this case, romantic, mystical, deep, passionate, authentic love - if you see this love outside of you, then the attachment you make with the person who objectifies these qualities reaches the very core of your existence.  But no one, no woman, nor man, can substitute for what you think you lack, and thus, this kind of attachment is a tragic error that ultimately leads to destruction.  I placed too much responsibility on my ex to fulfill my expectations of her which she was not able to fulfill, and visa versa, I wasn't able to fulfill her expectations of me because of the same tragic error.  When my ex left me unexpectedly and without warning behind my back while I was away at work, I experienced what I thought was the death of Love.  Because I'd placed true love outside of me, I experienced the absence of true love when she left me, and as a consequence, I was confronted with the dark night of my soul.  My attachment to her was so deep and so strong that her departure was excruciatingly painful, almost unendurable, until I discovered and found God, and thus found myself, and came to realize true love never left me, it was always within me, and when I fell in love with everything about me, I realized I am Love.

This is something I wrote down during that dark time in one of my darkest moments which I think is appropriate to enter here and share with you.  I wrote:  Love yourself unconditionally and unconditional love will manifest in your world.  Love yourself truly, and true love will find you.  Love yourself completely, and you will be complete.  If you want true love in your life, then it must start in you.  Be true to yourself, love yourself unconditionally, and watch the world reflect back to you what you see inside of you.  True unconditional love begins and ends with each one of us.  If I don't love myself unconditionally, and I attach it to someone outside of myself, inevitably I will get hurt because I see love as outside of me.  If I have unconditional love for me, then I can give that away, for I can only give away what I have for myself.  Attach love outside of myself to my relationships, and the love and joy I experience and receive is dependent upon what they do or don't do.  This erroneously puts love and joy in a conditional, co-dependent form and I am at the mercy of these co-dependent relationships.  Making ourselves whole (not dependent on outside relationships to give us love and joy), completing the circle, and practicing non-judgmental non-attachment offers the best way to be free to live life the way it was intended to be lived.

What does holding on to my attachments to people do when its time to let go of the old and usher in the new?  It keeps me locked in the love experiences of the past, longing for the past, recriminating myself for mistakes along the way, and wishing for those moments of love to return.  This love attachment to people no longer in my life, whether its a lover, a friend, or family member, prevents me from experiencing the love present all around me right now in front of me, and blocks the new love from coming in in another form.  The new love is probably 100 times better than my last relationship, but I can't allow it to manifest if my thoughts are preoccupied on what I lost and once had.  Reminiscing about the love I shared with my ex, for instance, keeps that relationship alive on some level.  This keeps the new love at bay, and I suffer because I don't have a partner to share in the experience of a sacred, romantic love.  Prior to my awakening and resurrection, this would have led me down the path of left turns, and before long, all the self-doubts, self-criticisms, and self-judgments would take over and reign.  The cycle of self-defeating thoughts and behaviors would only be interrupted when a new woman came to take her place - then, undoubtedly, the pattern would start all over because of my attachment to the idea of what this new woman in my life would represent.  Fortunately, I've moved beyond this, and am now seeing things from a whole new perspective.  Participating in life, loving all those I come across or come into my life unconditionally, because I love myself unconditionally, without any expectation or stake in the outcome is the best and most holistic policy.

Why do we attach?  Because we fear to lose something we value.  Whether it be love, relationships, our family, money, cars, houses, possessions, a scent, a touch, an experience of pure happiness - whatever it may be, we attach to it because we fear we may never experience it again, and if it's people, we fear we may never see them again.  My attachments are all rooted in my deep love for the people, places, and experiences I've had.  I will always love them, unconditionally, because that is who I am.  However, what would it be like to let go of all of it?  What if we could just drop all of our attachments to our thoughts about who we should be, what our relationships should be, what our beliefs should be, or what our lives should be?   Can you imagine, even for a moment, how free you would be to be yourself?  No longer defined by what others think of you, or what society thinks of you, or even what you think of yourself, but completely free from all attachments to the things, people, places, and thoughts which have influenced your idea of your individual identity.  Who would you be then?

Imagine a room full of chairs and every chair represented an attachment you had about yourself.  For every attachment you had, you had to pick up one chair.  Attachments could be: I need to be a good father.  I need to have a successful career.  I need to be a good son.  I need to be loyal to my friends and family.  I need to be seen as a good mother.  I need my children to respect me.  I need to be a great writer.  I need to have a big house and lots of cars to drive.  I need to be there for people when they need me.  I need to have true love in my life.  These are just some examples.  Now, these are just your attachments that you have for your own life.  That's a lot of chairs to hold on to.  Now add other people's issues to your attachment list when you take on their problems as your own (examples: my son needs to get a good job; my mother needs to find someone new in her life; my father needs to stop watching so much tv; my friend is wasting his life away and needs to get it together; my boyfriend needs to take responsibility for his life), and suddenly, you have the weight of the world on your shoulders.  Now imagine the relief and freedom one has by putting down those chairs.  For each attachment let go of, you set one chair down.  How light would you feel?  How happy would you be without all that burden attached to who you think you should be?  How much energy would you gain to do the things you want to do and be the person you want to be?

You can never deviate from your true nature.  If your nature is loving, releasing yourself from these attachments allows you to be more loving, there's more energy to love those around you without needing anything from them to fill you up.  You're already filled up.  There's nothing that needs to be added.  And life proceeds beautifully and effortlessly.  This is not to say you won't have challenges or confrontations, but you'll be coming from a different place, one in which you participate fully in the life that you have, but have no stake in the outcome.  You proceed moment to moment, fully aware and able to handle any and all situations that come your way because you are not burdened by your attachments to the end results.

Here's another thing to consider about attachments to beliefs, thoughts, people, places, or things in our past or present.  If a bird is tied down by a string around its leg, how high can it fly?  If our beliefs, thoughts, people, places, or things about the past or present are strings around our legs, we are kept from reaching the heights of our potential, and our lives are only partially lived.  Now consider this: can you catch the air?  Can you press the rewind button and go back to what was?  No, you can't.  Your life is lived moment to moment, it's fleeting, you can't catch it, or hold it, or stop it from advancing.  Change is happening all the time.  Nothing stays the same.  If you keep looking back, or holding on to what was, you'll never see what's ahead.  Something better is always just around the corner.  Let go of your attachments, give yourself a chance to grow and experience new things, and you just might be surprised at the person you end up becoming.

When you let go of attachments, you're left with you, and that's a wonderful place to start.  Trust in yourself. Believe in yourself.  Don't look back, there's nothing back there worth holding on to anyway.  Choose, right now, in this moment, to live an extraordinary life.  Take the time to examine your beliefs and why you believe them; question your fears and doubts; and look inside your heart and decide once and for all to be all that you're capable of being.  The greatest gift you can give to those you love, both past and present, is to be all that you are capable of being, making the most of yourself, for yourself, and for others; and, ironically, by making the most of yourself, you help others more.  You become an inspiration.  Your example will teach others what they themselves are capable of doing in their own lives.  Detach yourselves from all your former attachments, hold on to nothing from the past, learn and grow from it, that's all.  Remember, only love is real.  Move into the present, cherish every moment and hold on to none, and always come back to yourself.  You create your life.  Decide the life you want to live, unencumbered by the past, forgive others and forgive yourselves, and where necessary, make amends.  Have no regrets.  Live your life. It's a gift.  Let no one keep you down or diminish your value and self-worth.  We are all children of God.  All of us deserve to be happy experiencing love, joy, and peace.


 


Thursday, November 22, 2012

Gratitude - The Heart of Thanksgiving

Thanksgiving.  A time of giving thanks to all that is good in our lives.  We sit down with family and friends and celebrate the bounty of our lives with food, drink, friendship, and love.  For one day we are asked to set aside all the things that trouble us - whether it be financial struggles, strained relationships, or even the loss of a part of our lives we so deeply cherished.  Throughout the whole year we may have struggled with the changes life brings, and the new life is still in its nascent state, ready to emerge, but not yet, not now.  Seeds have been planted, and the shoots are starting to sprout, but Nature's rhythms can not be rushed, there is a harmony to all that is, to all that was and to all that will be.  This year, for many of us, has been a year of transition.  The old has passed away, never to return again, old structures have collapsed, relationships have ended, and in the midst of these great turmoils, when the birthing of the new can have its own spasms and convulsions, its setbacks and frustrations, it takes great courage to find the good in one's own life.  To remember that we are not held down by the chains of our past but by our own choosing.  The past is gone.  It can hurt us no more but in our minds.  It no longer exists.  And yet, this bridge to the new dawn can seem drawn out and endless, we long for what was lost because the future scares us, it is the infinite unknown, and without a firm faith in ourselves to overcome any challenge which might come our way, we might lose hope of ever breaking free into the new lives that are just waiting for us on the other end of this period of transformation.  The signs are there though, and with a firm conviction and determined resolve to resurrect our lives from whatever challenges us to become more than we were before, an attitude of endless gratitude accelerates the creative forces in this world to bring us to where we need to be next on this journey of our lives.  Thanksgiving is a time to reflect back on the times we had with those we love, to share in the love, bounty, and lives of those we are surrounded with at present, and be grateful for the life we do have.  Our lives are gifts given to us by our Creator, and with a grateful attitude, we are reminded how wonderful life really is when we set aside the issues that plague our minds.

I am grateful for all that has happened to me, even the "bad" stuff.  I couldn't say this a few months ago, my mind was so tormented and weighed down by my attachments to past memories, beliefs, experiences, and people, but I've come to a place where I've learned to accept everything, and know that everything has happened for my own good, I just had to find it.  And it wasn't easy.  I've spent most of the year turning my thoughts inward and finding myself.  Inner spiritual work is the hardest work to be done because it requires an unflinching effort to truly understand and 'know thyself' without being defined by society or others who might want to define you a certain way.  It's about taking a stand for your true self.  Who do I want to be, not who my family wants me to be, or my lover, or my friends, or anyone else whose influence forced us to be fragmented people living up to their expectations.  The greatest gift you could ever give to yourself is to excavate the inner workings of your inner world and discover who you really are and by discovering who you really are, you connect to your Source, the life force within you and within everything you see, and then you begin to live your life on purpose, aligned with the truth in you, and suddenly creativity, love, beauty, and abundance begin to flourish.  One of the keys to this renaissance in anyone's life is gratitude.  Gratitude brings us in closer alignment with the all creative force of the universe, and we learn to see and understand how much good there is in our own lives to be grateful for.  By being grateful for all that happens in our lives, by being grateful for our lives, the universe responds with appreciation, and radiates back to you what you have elected to radiate outward.  Grateful thoughts, words, and deeds, attract only good into our lives, because we refuse to be held down by what our situations or circumstances may be.  Instead, we find and appreciate the good that is there, that will draw us out of our predicaments, and lead us to where we want to be, in full appreciation for who we are, in love with ourselves, and in love with all of life.  Gratitude is key to reaching your highest goals and aspirations, for it is impossible to feel stressed and unhappy about oneself or angry and resentful of others if one is in a constant state of appreciation.

There was an exercise I did earlier this year which required me to find 5 things every day for which I was grateful for, and 3 things for which I was grateful for not.  Suffice it to say, I learned through my daily writings of how much there is in my life to be thankful for; how beautiful, how rich, and wonderful my life truly is.  How blessed it is.  Sometimes we can't see it when the storm clouds are raining heavily on our personal journeys and life looks hopeless and grim.  But I venture to say, those times are sent to us to wake us up to the beauty that is us.  Grief, pain, suffering of any kind is an opportunity to let go of something that no longer defines us, we are called to grow and expand ourselves to new horizons, and it is our attachments to that which was and not what is that keeps us in the prison house of pain.  By being grateful we neutralize the effects of these painful experiences, allow space to open up within our hearts, and then God comes in and heals our wounds.  Gratitude keeps us in constant contact with God, and as a consequence, we naturally are kinder and gentler to all those who enter and leave our lives.  Soon we learn we are not defined by what happens to us, because when we touch the inner source of our beingness, we know nothing outside of us can affect or change the gratitude we have for the life we live right now, in this moment.  Good and bad things happen to us all, it's a part of life, and to be grateful for all that happens, no matter what, keeps us in constant contact with the inner joy, love, and peace that is our true eternal nature.

What am I grateful for at this time of thanksgiving?  I'm grateful for the freedom to walk down to the grocery store and buy food whenever I want or need.  I'm grateful for running water in my apartment.  I'm grateful for the roof over my head, clothes on my body, and food in the refrigerator.  I'm grateful for the ability to read and write.   I'm grateful for the air I breathe.  I'm grateful for my parents falling in love with each other and out of their love, I was born and given life.  I'm grateful for all the life lessons my parents have taught me throughout the years and the values, principles, and ethics they imparted to me.  I'm grateful for the the love I share with my parents, my siblings, my extended family, my friends and acquaintances.  I'm grateful for this country and the freedoms I have.  I'm grateful for the opportunity granted in this country to stretch, grow, and challenge myself to become all that I am capable of becoming.  I'm grateful for a bed to sleep in at night.  I'm grateful for a job that encourages and supports my artistic aspirations.  I'm grateful for the wonderful people I work for and work with.  I'm grateful for the elephant theater company, my artistic home.  I'm grateful for the opportunity to write this blog and speak the things that are on my mind and have a forum to discuss important topics.  I'm grateful for the opportunity to help those who suffer from PTSD and other traumas through the spiritual counseling I've been trained to do and help them to find their joy and freedom once again.  I'm grateful for the birds that sing when I wake up in the morning.  I'm grateful for the sun, the sky, the clouds, the mountains, the ocean.  I'm grateful for just being me, without feeling the need to please or seek validation or approval from another human being.  I'm grateful  for the realization that I am enough.  I'm grateful for the angel God sent me who helped me to transform my life.  I'm grateful for my eyes, ears, nose, mouth, skin, muscles, and bones that make up my body.  I'm grateful for my health, physical fitness, and vitality.  I'm grateful for my mind, my heart, and my soul.  I'm eternally grateful to God for creating me and giving me life.                            

I could go on and on, it's amazing really what we are grateful for if we could only stop the incessant noise of the voices going on inside of our heads.  Now, what am I grateful for not being/doing/having etc.?  I'm grateful for not fighting in a war.  I'm grateful for not living in abject poverty in Afghanistan, India, or Southeast Asia.  I'm grateful for not being a child caught in the child-sex slave trade.  I'm grateful for not being a slave, in any form.  I'm grateful for not being paralyzed and in a wheelchair.  I'm grateful for not being sick.  I'm grateful for not having to live with and die of cancer.  I'm grateful for not being trapped in a hole several miles down under the ground.  I'm grateful for not being dragged behind a car.  I'm grateful for not being in a hopeless situation.  I'm grateful for not being at the mercy of someone else's opinion or expectation of me.  I'm grateful for not being attached to negative people, experiences, memories, or thoughts anymore.  I'm grateful for not being tortured.  I'm grateful for not being afraid to face my truth.  I'm grateful for not being chained to the past anymore.  I'm grateful for not living in sin, guilt, shame, or blame.  I'm grateful for not being ruled and controlled by my anger and my ego.  I'm grateful for not being blind or deaf or mentally handicapped or deformed.  I'm grateful for not being homeless.  I am grateful for not being cruel.  I'm grateful  for not being hunted down by government forces.  I'm grateful for not being in Syria, or Israel, or Gaza, smack in the middle of a war zone.  I'm grateful for not being in a dysfunctional co-dependent relationship.  I'm grateful for not being ugly or unattractive.  I'm grateful for not wasting my talents and gifts.  I'm grateful for not being separated from the source of my life anymore.  I'm grateful for not having a broken spirit.  I'm grateful for not losing my love for myself and for my life.

Give this a try during this time of giving thanks to all that's good in our lives.  Spend 5 minutes for the next thirty days, get a journal and write down every day 5 things for which you are grateful for and 3 things for which you are grateful for not.  Within days, you should feel a shift inside where your life feels more blessed and beautiful, and not so weighed down by the issues and problems affecting you.  With the sense of lightness and gratitude that comes with doing this exercise, the problems which you do have will not appear as formidable as they once appeared, and you might actually find the solutions to them hiding behind your habitual negative thought patterns.  Besides that, a inner sense of joy starts to kindle inside and waken you to the beauty that is your life.  Share your thoughts if you feel compelled.  It would be fantastic if people reading this blog shared what they were grateful for and what they were grateful for not.  Post them in the comments section.  I would love to know.  Gratitude is contagious.  We get a larger sense of the immense beauty of life when we share our thoughts and feelings about what we are thankful for, it unites us in love and in all that is good, and it keeps life in a proper perspective.

Many blessings to all of you on this Thanksgiving Day.

    


Friday, November 16, 2012

Inspiration - All That I've Accomplished Over Time

So often we define ourselves by the obstacles we've overcome.  Most of us spend a good portion of our time occupied with the thoughts of the hardships we've been through, or the challenges we faced, or the problems which continue to plague our lives.  Funny how those problems never seem to go away when we're always fixated on them.  The more energy we give to the issues in our lives, the bigger they become, and the more insurmountable they appear to be.  When you focus only on your obstacles, you tend to get more obstacles in your way, because what you focus on extends, and if you focus on problems, guess what, you get more of the same problems.  I certainly have been a perpetrator of this negative thought process, and as a consequence, the problems never seemed to go away, and like Sisyphus, I pushed that boulder up the hill, only for it to roll back down again, and I have to start all over.  In the midst of focusing only on what's wrong, I conveniently forgot what's gone right, and how much I've been able to accomplish in spite of myself and my self-defeating thoughts and habits.  When you begin to question what you think and why you think it, it becomes evident that we are our greatest obstacle to achieving the great things we are capable of achieving in our individual lives.  So, for this installment, I've decided to celebrate and own my accomplishments, and what I have been able to achieve in my lifetime up to this point, as a way of changing the way I look at myself and the world around me.  By focusing on what I've accomplished, I change the energy flow in my body towards a more expansive and positive outlook than by focusing on what went wrong and beating myself up for it.  The only thing the past is good for is to learn from and grow from, and when we own who we are by what we've accomplished and given to the world, we invite more of that into our lives because it makes us feel good about ourselves.  It's hard to feel good about yourself if you're only focusing on the bad stuff.  I also want to take this time to thank all those who've helped me along the way, because without you, I may not have found the courage, strength, or desire to push myself beyond my limitations and succeed like I have done so many times.  To all of you, I offer you my deepest and sincerest gratitude.

Here's my list of accomplishments:

  • I graduated from the U.S. Air Force Academy.  One of the greatest moments of my life, and I couldn't have reached that plateau without the love and support of my parents, my family, my friends from high school (Mike Palmer, Josh Tolini, and Chad Oshner), and my friends from the Academy: Jason Ortiz, Mark Pizzimenti, Dave Owens, Mike McDermott, Mike Patterson, Chris Thompson, Mike Hanna, Yumi Ramirez, CJ, and all the guys and girls from 11th Squadron.  Thank you all for all that you gave me during that time.
  • While serving in the Air Force at Los Angeles Air Force Base, I led a project to develop a new, advanced Global Positioning System upgrade; I decisively developed and implemented installations plan when the Air Force needed to install new ground system software on short notice after identifying system operational errors;  I initiated, helped develop, and implemented a report database and prioritization process online when the Air Force needed to resolve fielded maintenance reports; and I created and implemented a plan that consolidated the essential information of a complicated, complex satellite program into a newcomer's orientation training package.   
  • My senior year at the Air Force Academy, I was the Survival Squadron Commander and responsible for the training of 3rd Class cadets in the survival portion of the SERE (Survival Evasion Resistance and Escape) Training program.
  • I studied, trained, and graduated from the Stella Adler Academy of Acting in Los Angeles in order to become a professional actor.  (Many thanks to go around, especially to my parents, who supported me in my transition from the military to the arts; Eugene Lazarev, my mentor, who taught me the art of acting and to trust in my own creative nature; Tim McNeil, my beloved teacher and friend who's passion for acting is so contagious he makes me feel inspired every time I take the stage; Linda Phillips-Palo, who urged me to go and study at Stella Adler, and has been there every step to watch me grow into the actor I am today;  John Jack Rodgers; Beverly Leech; Charles Waxberg; and all the great teachers there at Stella's who opened me up and laid the foundation for performing excellence, thank you all).
  • I delivered the valedictory speech to my graduating class at Stella's commencement ceremony.
  • I studied Shakespeare at the Midsummer in Oxford Program hosted by the British American Drama Academy.  It was an intensive summer conservatory program held at Balliol College, Oxford, England.  Only 122 people were admitted into the program from all over the world!  (Thank you Stella teachers!)
  • I've performed in numerous plays, films, and webisodes over the last 10 years.  Some of the most notable roles in plays include: Pozzo in Waiting for Godot; Laertes and the Player King in Hamlet; Dr. Prentice in What the Butler Saw;  Robert in Harold Pinter's Betrayal; and Smirnoff in Chekhov's The Bear.  
  • I performed in New York a monologue play called 'Times Scream and Hurry' at the Cherry Lane Theatre during the New York Fringe Festival which received many accolades from casting and industry people who came to see it.
  • I've acted in two webisode series' that were Emmy nominated - 'Sam has Seven Friends,' and 'Prom Queen.'  (Thank you to Chris Hampel, Chris McCaleb, Ryan Wise, and Doug Cheney who cast me in the part and believed in me.)
  • Currently, I have a tv series running on the CW Network website, the next installment of the 'Prom Queen' series titled 'The Homecoming', and I am a recurring lead in the series.  (Again, a HUGE thank you to the guys above.  I am so grateful you gave me the opportunity.)
  • I am a member of the Screen Actors Guild/American Federation of Television and Radio Artists Union. (Thank you Linda!)
  • I am a member of the award-winning Elephant Theater Company here in Los Angeles (Thank you Dave Fofi, Lindsay, Pam, Tara, Doug, Tony, and the whole elephant herd.  You are like family to me!)
  • I've partnered up with my friend Paul Hoan Zeidler and formed our own not-for-profit production company called Sewer Socialist Productions.  We've produced 3 shows over the last three years, have more shows coming, and a film in the works!  (Thank you Paul for inviting me to be an integral part in the forming of this company.  Excited to see where it goes!)  
  • I worked as a free-lance journalist for the United States International Mission.  I reported on the plight of the orphans in the Hmong villages and helped to initiate actions to begin construction of an orphanage within the city of Chang Mai, Thailand for 50 Hmong children.  (Thank you to Eric King, Denis Catron, Pam Brown, and all who I worked with in this organization.  Thank you for believing in me and trusting me to do the job.)
  • I was a board member of USIM and contributed my time and energies to help bring awareness to the child sex-slave trade going on in Southeast Asia.  (Thank you Denis for recommending me to the board and for all those who voted me in.  It was an honor to be a part of it.)
  • I have cultivated and expanded my knowledge and understanding of the deeper truths of life through the readings of poetry and plays, personal studies in the classics, philosophy, and literature.  Also, I have expanded my awareness and understanding of spirituality and higher consciousness, and consider myself a student of the mysteries of life. (Thank you to all those who've brought knowledge into my life, especially my father, who brought me to the Greeks, and Dr. Sarah Larsen, who's deepened my knowledge and understanding of the mysteries of life far beyond anything I could have ever imagined.  I am eternally grateful to you both!)
  • At the Air Force Academy, I was on the Dean's List 3 consecutive times - average 21 semester hours.  I was also an intercollegiate football team member.
  • In high school, I was a member of the National Honor Society.  I graduated with a 3.8 GPA on a 4.0 scale.  My senior year, I was voted "Best All-Around" by my high school classmates. (Thank you)
  • I was awarded All-Conference Honors for my performance on the football field in high school.
  • I volunteered for Camp del Corazon out here in LA - a week long summer camp for kids with congenital heart disease. (Thank you Camp del Corazon for welcoming me as a camp volunteer!)
  • I am a great trout fisherman. (Thanks Pa)
  • I sang and toured the country as a member of the Colorado Children's Chorale. (Thank you Mom for pushing me to give it a try; and Mr. Wolfe, and all those I sang with, those times are some of my most cherished childhood memories, thank you for making them so wonderful.)
  • I sang and performed in two operas as a child - Puccini's La Boheme, and Bizet's Carmen.
  • I played the lead role of Tom Sawyer in my sixth grade musical 'Tom Sawyer.' (Thank you Mrs. Lund)
  • And this year, I have completed my first book proposal.  I've submitted it, and now have a literary manager who loves my idea and is going to help me to get it done.  Eventually, I will turn it into a script. (Thank you Dr. Sarah, for so many reasons).
I'm proud of everything I've listed here.  These accomplishments truly define who I am, because they reflect the best in me, not the worst, and if we could just look at ourselves in this space, in our own respective lives, we might be inspired to do more.  Self-actualized and self-realized people build off of their accomplishments, and learn from their mistakes, and their effort is always towards becoming and being the best version of their selves in every moment.  Of course, without the help and assistance from people along the way, those who encourage and support us, who stand by us when we're down and lift us up, who light up with joy when they watch you succeed, none of us could ever reach the highest we are capable of reaching without those people in our lives who's influence gave us the tools and motivation we needed to keep going.  And, in my case, the institutions of learning where I studied provided me the luxury to develop all of my talents, skills, and abilities.  I've been very fortunate and I am very grateful to all who have helped me to get to where I am today.  I wouldn't change a thing, and I'm looking forward to the future like I've never have before.  There is so much more I want to accomplish.


       www.badaonline.com

Friday, November 9, 2012

Better Friends

A father's love is such a special gift.  As a child, growing up, I had a deep love and admiration for my father, and we spent many wonderful times together.  Some of my fondest memories were the fishing trips we would take to lake Granby, in Colorado.  As we'd approach the lake, just as the sun was about to rise, my father would break out into song and sing "The War of 1812", and in my joy of just being with my dad, I'd try to sing it with him.  We'd set our poles in the water in the perfect spot, my dad always knew where the fish would be, and within a few hours, we'd have a stringer of fish to show for our efforts.  Of course, he was and still is the master, and while I was staring off into the sky looking at the clouds floating by, he was catching fish left and right, and I marveled at how he could do it (probably because he was watching his pole!).  He taught me how to fish, but he also taught me a lot of other things too, which has helped me to be the man I am today.  As a young boy and adolescent, I idolized my father, and I wanted to be like him.  He was tall, handsome, strong, powerful, and full of vigor and determination.  There was no problem my dad could not overcome.  He worked hard for his family, and built a beautiful life for me, my mom, and my siblings to live in, and because of his dedication to his family, he worked long hours to provide us the lifestyle we had.  My siblings, mom, and I were able to do just about whatever we wanted.  Money, or the lack of it, was never a problem to be feared, he wanted us to enjoy life, but unfortunately, he wasn't always able to be with us because work required him to be in the office or out in the field.  But for him, I think he received much satisfaction in seeing his children happy by the things his labor enabled them to do and receive.

The relationship between fathers and sons can be very complicated.  I think one of our greatest desires is to have a deep, authentic relationship with our fathers, but often times, there are many things that stand in the way of opening the possibility for that closer connection.  Fathers are easily blamed for not being emotionally available to us as kids, as being too mean, or hard, or not taking the time to be with us, and we resent our fathers for it.  My father was a strict disciplinarian, and if I stepped outside of the boundaries too far, he'd be right there all over me to reel me back in.  His fuse ran fast, his engine was on turbo speed, and he could go from calm to fierce rage in a second, and being a sensitive boy, I grew to fear my father.  This doesn't mean I don't love my father, I absolutely do, but because I feared him and was deeply sensitized to his moods, I conditioned myself to become very passive and submissive whenever I felt intimidated by him.  These resentments built up over time, and as I got older, I perceived my sensitive nature as a weakness, and blamed my father for it.  The idea of standing up to my father was ludicrous, he was a Vietnam veteran, a former Navy Seal, and the war (and I know he may disagree with this, but the evidence is indisputable) had a profound effect on him, especially when I was young.  The sons of fathers who have been to war are inevitably affected by that war as a consequence of the major emotional and psychological trauma their fathers' go through.  That kind of pain one experiences in battle, the horrors one sees and experiences, gets layered over and over with emotional and psychological defenses, the need to protect that inner self is so strong, that it must be defended against at all costs.  Sons of military men or veterans are often confused about why their fathers are so distant, or why does he get mad at me for no reason, or why is he so hard on me?  The pain of war or PTSD is so intense and constant, it is impossible to carry on normal emotional relationships with people.  From my experience with it, the last thing you want to do is let somebody in, to let them see your vulnerability, to allow the possibility for them to hurt you emotionally, and so, when I experienced it, I shut off from desiring intimate relations with people outside of my family.  On the flip side, the littlest thing triggers you because you have so much rage inside, it's very easy to explode.  Add alcohol or drugs to the disorder, and you are a walking time bomb.  I know when I was drinking in the midst of my bout with a severe case of PTSD, the alcohol brought out all the emotions I felt onto the surface, and I was at the mercy of what I felt, and worse, I couldn't control it.  The deeper the pain, the greater the rage, and without treatment, it creates dysfunctional behavioral patterns where small insignificant things are the causes of major eruptions that end up causing major psychological scars for all the people involved.  This is something I believe many sons, daughters, wives, and husbands, have experienced from the spouse or parent returning from war, and these cycles get repeated, these waves of trauma get repeated (dysfunctional relationships, tense family relationships, etc.), from one generation to the next generation and to the next, until we take responsibility in our own lives to end the cycle.  But I digress.

My father was always there for me.  If I ever needed him, he was right there, and if I was ever in trouble, the one man I could count on to get me through it was him.  Of all the fathers out there, I was so proud to call him mine, he was the rock cliff everyone came to for shelter in times of crisis, and he was the oak tree we all took shelter under when it was raining in our lives.  My father is a brilliant man.  He ignited my intellectual passion for the Greeks and Romans, gave me books to read, and engaged me on many intellectual discourses from philosophy to literature to train my mind to think and synthesize the thoughts and ideas I was learning.  And when I joined the military by going to the Academy, I felt we had a deeper bond because we had more in common, and it was always my desire to understand him better.  There are so many memories I have with him that were happy memories, where we shared and expressed our love for each other, whether it was sitting outside on the porch smoking a cigar, or listening to music, or taking a ride in the car to get some coffee, there were many great times.  But life has a way of bringing things to the surface that need to be healed, and often, these periods of healing are preceded by periods of great adversity and pain.  Without going into detail, our family went through a difficult time, and as a consequence, my relationship with my father became strained, and when he divorced my mother after 40 years, I was very angry at him for the pain he inflicted on my mother.  Our relationship has not been the same since.

Now that the dust has settled, and after my recovery from the disastrous effects of the PTSD I experienced after my ex-fiance left me unexpectedly and with such cruelty, I've come to a wonderful place of peace and acceptance for all those who are in my life.  I've done an incredible amount of spiritual work, have uncovered and healed all of my wounds, some that went as far back as my early childhood, and I've come to realize everyone is simply trying to do the best they can.  I believe out of the destruction of what was, something better and more authentic can come about when we realize and acknowledge that we are each unique individuals traveling along a human journey.  The anger and resentments I've had about my father and his recent actions prevent me from having a new, and possibly better relationship than before.  My attachment to what he should have done, or the "unforgivable" act he committed, only gets in the way of loving and experiencing his love for me now.  So, I've asked myself, do I want to hold onto this grievance, or do I want to be at peace with my dad, and maybe even become better friends?

There's this wonderful book I just read by Greg Larsen called Better Friends, and its about how to be at peace with your father and create the friendship that you want.  It all starts with forgiveness and love and recognizing and acknowledging your father as a human being, and honoring him for it.  I realize my father was doing the best he could, and was just living out the conditioning of his journey in the world he grew up in, from childhood to adulthood.  He made mistakes, but so have I, and as long as I focus and give energy to the pain of my past, it keeps the past alive, and as long as the pain of the past is kept alive, it is impossible to have a loving relationship with my dad.  I could either live in the pain, and stay stuck there, or I could choose a different course, withdraw the negative energy attached to those memories, allow for enough space to enter in where love and forgiveness could take seed, and as this has happened, the emotional charge of the memories has disappeared.  As I continue to cultivate this awareness of how my emotionally triggered thoughts about the past keep me from living fully in the present, my life has become brighter and happier as a consequence.  By being in complete acceptance of how my life has unfolded, I can live more consciously today, and see the world as it really is.  And when you start seeing the world as it really is, the world suddenly becomes filled with immense beauty and joy, and then you come to realize how much of your life is a precious gift.

When you experience this expansion of happiness, when your consciousness expands, to include everything around you, this inner space makes forgiveness a possibility.  You are no longer focused on the pain.  When you focus on the pain, you create more pain.  It's law.  It's a field of energy we attract ourselves to, a field of unhappiness, and unless we clean this up, we'll keep the same programs running through our head.  "My father did this to me."  "My father didn't love me."  "My father should have done this."  And on and on and on.  We must consciously make a choice to evolve beyond this, to recognize and sense our natural state of inner joy, peace, and love.  When we connect to this, and see that this is our true state, not the programs our ego has been operating within us for years, you naturally forgive others and yourself.  It can be no other way.

There is a collective residue of pain residing in the father/child relationship and you hear it in the collective stories of dads all across our society, in our communities, in our own families.  These stories are passed down from generation to generation and we carry those stories from our fathers with us.  In addition, we carry everything our fathers (and their fathers, and so on and so on) ever did within us, and so, it is vitally important to clean up the energy and dissolve the trapped pain within us that is intimately connected to our fathers.  By doing so, you allow that energy to be released, and the father/child relationship can evolve towards a new potential.  It's our responsibility to do this.  Your children and their children will benefit from the work that you do now.  And the added benefit, is the relationship you have with your father will be transformed.  Without the negative energy's corrupting influence, the chance to create an authentic relationship with your father is greatly improved.  But as long as the past remains charged with anger, bitterness, and resentment, then it will be a struggle to create the friendship that you want with your dad.

I found Greg Larsen's book to be extremely valuable and appropriate for me and the relationship I want to cultivate with my father.  As long as we hold our fathers as prisoners to their past failings, we can never see them for who they really are, and we miss out on experiencing their love for us.  We may not always agree with them, heck we may never agree with them, but we can work to cultivate a healthy, loving, authentic father/son relationship, and by so doing, make peace with our dads and become better friends.


        


Thursday, November 1, 2012

The Science of Getting Rich - by Wallace D. Wattles

Sometimes you come across a book that just makes your head spin and reshapes the way you view the world.  Last week, I read this book titled The Science of Getting Rich, written by Wallace D. Wattles, and published in 1910.  The book was lost for decades, and only recently was it rediscovered.  It offers timeless principles about how to create wealth in your life, and utilizing a scientific approach to it that could be tested and proven to work.  His plan of action, Wallace asserts, has been thoroughly tested and is grounded in the monistic theory of the universe that One is All, and that All is One.  I will attempt to give summary to this provocative and eye-opening book on a topic of vital importance to all our lives, which is how do we create the wealth we want to have in order to live the lives we want to live, and I intend to do it in the most simplistic way possible, hitting the most essential points of interest.  First and foremost is the idea that we have a right to be rich.

Now, here me out.  It is not possible for any man to achieve all that he is capable of in talent and soul development unless he has plenty of money because he must have many things to use to unfold the soul and develop the talent that he has, and he cannot use these things unless he has them, and unless he has the money to buy them.  The object of our life is to develop ourselves to our fullest capacity in all areas of life, mental, emotional, physical and spiritual, and to be happy.  In order for us to fulfill our desire to become all we are capable of becoming, which is a desire inherent in human nature, we must be able to make use of things, and in order to have the free use of things, you must become rich enough to buy them.  As Wattles put it, "The man who owns all he wants for the living of all the life he is capable of living is rich;" the desire to be rich is for a more abundant and fulfilling life, and to share in the extension and increase of life itself.  We have three motives for which we live: the body, the mind, and the soul.  Not one is better or more sacred than the other, all are desirable, and no one can live life to its fullest if one or more is cut short of full life and expression.  To focus only on the body and its desires does not complete a man, nor does focusing only on the mind or the soul.  Each one, body, mind, and soul, needs to be fully functioning in order for man to be really happy and satisfied.  Man must have his physical needs met, his health, freedom from excessive toil and rest and recreation.  To live fully in mind, man must have books and the time to study them, opportunity to travel to new places and gain new experiences, have intellectual companionship, and surround himself with the objects of art and beauty for use and enjoyment.  For the soul, man must have at his core love, and love is unfolded in the doing and receiving of things, both material and immaterial, and in Being.  So, all three must be fully developed, and given the opportunity and possibility for seeking expression, and it is in the use of material things that man is able to fill his life for his body, develop his mind, and unfold his soul.  Thus, the study of the science of getting rich is noble and necessary.  

Now, the fundamental premise behind the science of getting rich is that the whole universe, everything you see on earth is made from one original substance, the invisible formless stuff, out of which all visible forms and things proceed.  This inexhaustible, limitless supply of formless stuff is alive with creative energy and is constantly producing new forms.  This formless stuff, let's call it Original Source, is all around us, as well as within us.  Source is infinitely intelligent; it thinks; it is alive, and is constantly impelling life forward.  It is a natural and innate impulse of life to seek to live more; to expand, to push the nature of its boundaries and consciousness and find fuller expression.  We are made of this stuff.  We are part of it.  Hence, the universe is a great Living Presence, steadily moving forward towards more life and more functioning.  The impelling motive: the increase of life. 

The first principle in the Science of Getting Rich is this: "Thought is the only power which can produce tangible riches from the Formless Substance.  The stuff from which all things are made is a substance which thinks, and a thought of form in this substance produces the form."  We were created out of this original substance because original substance thought of our form (created in God's likeness) and then we were created.  That's the way all forms are created, everything that you see.  Man has the ability to originate thought, and by impressing his thoughts on the original substance or source, he can cause the thing he thinks about to be created.  That's how powerful we truly are.  Once we understand the nature of things and how we came about, we can align ourselves with our deepest desires and longings, and visualize these events as we would like them to happen, and so imprint this thought upon Spirit, Formless Substance, Original Source, God, whatever you want to call it, and set into motion the creation of the event in physical form.  It's when we realize this, the oneness of everything, that we lose all fear and doubt about our lives and start creating the lives we want to live, in harmony with the world and people around us.  

Wattles explains in great detail the increase of life.  Life is forever becoming more.  The One Substance desires to live more in all of its expressions and all of its forms which includes us.  The desire to make more money is the same desire for increase of life that makes a plant or tree grow from a seed.  It is an invisible, formless field of energy - the power of intention which lies behind the desire to seek fulfillment and greater expression.  The desire to make more money comes from the basic urge of life for continual increase, because life, in the mere act of living, must expand, and for man, in order to know more, do more, and be more, he must have the use of things.  Money enables us to live more fully.  To seek riches then, is not evil, evil is what men do, money can also be used for good.  Money will only make you more of what you already are, and thus, if your desire for riches is to expand your life for greater fulfillment and expression, it is important to harmonizes this purpose with the purpose that is in All, the increase of life.  God wants you to live fully and abundantly.  By living in such a way, he can express himself better through you if you are unrestrained by financial limitations, and are free to perform all your functions physical, mental, and spiritual, without excess in any.  The satisfaction of sensual gratifications is not the only part of life, and if that is all you focus on, then you are not really living life.  It's only a partial life, likewise if you are only living for the mental and spiritual pleasures.  There is a balance that we seek, and when all three are functioning at their fullest capacity and given the means to express their desires, then our lives are in harmony with the whole, and we become the men and women we are capable of becoming.  Thus, it is our responsibility to make the most of ourselves, and live our lives on purpose.  Wattles warns us though to avoid competition, which is geared toward taking something away from someone else, and instead, focus your attention on creating.  He states, "Intelligent Substance will make things for you, but it will not take things away from someone else and give them to you."  The formless supply is unlimited, and will give you what you want but in a way where everyone will have more than he has now.  It is a paradigm shift, because we live in a world where we see limited resources, but in the formless realm, there are no limitations to what we can create, and thus, we must look to what is not there and know that with clear thought and intention, along with an understanding about how things come into manifestation, there is nothing we cannot have, if our lives are aligned with Spirit.  And one of the ways we stay aligned with Source is to adopt this principle in your business transactions: give more to every man in "use value" than you receive in "cash value" for your products or services.  By doing this, we add to the life of the world by everything we do, and every transaction we are involved.  Remember, life seeks to increase itself, when you see yourself as increasing life by the things that you do, then you are doing things in a Certain Way.

Wattles talks about doing things in a Certain Way, and it encompasses several things which I will do my best to illustrate without reverting to repeating passages from his book, which if what I've written thus far compels you to investigate what he actually wrote, I highly suggest you find this book and read it yourself!  We must get a clear picture of what it is we'd like to have, what it is we'd like to experience, what it is we'd like to do, and hold this thought or vision clearly in our minds.  You must have the unquestioning faith that what it is you'd like to have and experience is coming, it is already yours, and will be brought to you by the Thinking Substance that is everywhere, in all, through all, influencing all, and is acting upon all the minds of men at all times.  God wants you to be happy.  Either we live in a friendly universe or we live in a hostile universe, the most important decision we make is the one we decide upon.  If it's hostile, than the whole idea of the expansion of life in order for more complete expression is a farce, and God is a sadistic, cruel God who created us only to watch us suffer.  If it's a friendly universe, then God wants us to be happy, and will aid us on our journey to enjoy the things that bring us happiness.  We get to choose.  It's our free will to decide if we align with Spirit or not, that's the gift of freedom, and how we choose determines the quality of life we have and live.  So, if we believe spirit came before matter, if God is in everything, and we all came from the One Original Substance, then, we must convey our deepest longings and desires to God, to this formless substance, who can set into motion the bringing of the things that we desire into form in a harmonious way that is beneficial to all.

How do we stay in harmonious relation to the mind of God?  One word: Gratitude.  We must be in constant state of gratitude for all the things that come into or shows up in our lives.  Gratitude keeps us aligned with our highest selves, re-adjusts our mental habits and grants us the ability to atone with our maker for the mistakes we made in our lives.  It allows us to see all the beauty that exists around us, and when good things come to us, the more grateful we are, the more good things come.  It's similar to the law of cause and effect, and since the grateful mind is constantly fixed on the best, more of the best will come, and will be received by the one who is grateful.  All things that come into our lives are for our own good, even the things which seem bad have a silver lining if perceived correctly, and can aid us in our advancement towards the life we want to live and the people we want to be.  Dwelling on bad things only brings more bad things; dwelling on good things brings more good things.  It's law.  Thus, having an attitude of gratefulness will bring us in line with the divine in us, and more good things will come.  A grateful mind expects good things to come, and this expectation becomes faith.  Faith is a key ingredient to making your vision for your life a reality.

So our thoughts create our reality, what we think about is what we become.  Therefore, we must be very clear about what we think about.  Wattles states, "The scientific use of thought consists in forming a clear and distinct mental image of what you want; in holding fast to the purpose to get what you want; and in realizing with grateful faith that you do get what you want."  However, there is one final thing you must do: you must act in a Certain Way, so that when the things and experiences you envision come to you, you know what to do with them and put them in their appropriate places.  It is only by action that we receive what we desire.  "God helps those who help themselves."  Hence, we must act now.  In whatever business you may be in, whatever environment, you act upon it with all your heart, with all your mind, with all your strength, holding on to the vision you have for yourself and believing its on its way.  Think from the end, as if it's already here, and you begin to set in motion the creative forces of the original substance to bring your vision into reality.   You get a change of environment, a change of circumstance only by taking action now.  That's all there is, the only time you have is now, and that is where you have to begin.  You must do the work you have today and do it well while retaining your vision, holding to your purpose, and maintaining your gratitude and faith.  Banish doubt, it does not serve you, and only blocks all the good that is coming to you.  Doubt will keep your life held in abeyance indefinitely, so remove it from your thought process.  As Shakespeare put it, "Our doubts are traitors, and make us lose the good we oft might win by fearing attempt."

We must do all that we can do where we are right now.  Waste no time.  A day can be successful or a failure by virtue of the fact whether we acted on behalf of the vision we set for ourselves.  Even the most trivial act can have profound consequences; many doors are opened by that very trivial, small thing we do which miraculously sets us on the path to our own self-actualization and the fullest realization of ourselves and our lives.  If you can do something today, do it, and do it with all your heart, knowing that it is taking you one step closer to the life you want to live.  Successful action is cumulative in its results.  Move towards the larger life you envision for yourself by acting now, put all your faith and purpose into it, and every successful act will open the way towards more successful acts.  No act can be too little, and if every action is done efficiently, if every act of your life is done with the faith and purpose behind it, you and your life will be a success.

Additionally, you must give off the impression of increase.  All your actions and efforts must convey to the minds of others that you are giving them more than what meets the eye.  You are following in the way of increase, and let this faith inspire, motivate, and permeate every action that you do.  This will inevitably rub off onto others because by holding firm in the conviction you are an advancing man or woman, you are also giving this advancement to everyone you meet.  Have you ever been in the presence of a very influential man or woman who has a vision for themselves and others?  Do you not feel inspired on some level, as if you're life has been increased by listening to them, talking to them, hearing them give a speech, or watching them perform?  We receive from them a sense of our own greatness, of what we might be capable of in our own respective lives, their light shines brightly and brings out the light in us, and we believe we can become better, happier people.  We are given increase, and because increase is desirous of life, we are attracted to that which gives us increase.  People gravitate to those who bring out the best in them, because we inherently want to be the best we can be, and those who give us a sense of the best in us, we naturally are drawn to them.  Thus, you want to do everything you do with the unshakable faith that you are an advancing personality giving increase to all.  Give all that you are, give all that you have, and life will respond by giving back to you all that it is.  What you give, you receive, and by giving increase to life and to the people in your life, your life will increase and expand.  Whatever you want for yourself, want it for everybody.

If you follow these principles and put them into practice in your own life, Wattles declares with absolute certainty you will get rich.  "And the riches they receive will be in exact proportion to the definiteness of their vision, the fixity of their purpose, the steadiness of their faith, and the depth of their gratitude."  So, how do we know whether or not Wattles is correct or just some crackpot from the early 20th Century who read too much of the philosophy of Emerson and Hegel and others who promulgated the monistic theory of the universe with which he based his whole science of getting rich?  Is he speaking the truth?  Well, the beauty of science is that you can test it to see if what you theorized and postulated is correct or not.  By applying the principles in this article, if it is a true science, one should be able to observe the results in the material world of our lives.  Hence, just as I take the law of gravitation to be true, or the law of magnetism, why not assume what Wattles says is also true, and by experiment, discover whether his reasoning is true or false.  It certainly wouldn't hurt, and there is much value in living a life where you feel you are adding to the increase and expression of life rather than competing with others for the scraps that are left.  If what he says is true, then there is not one of us who cannot apply these practical instructions and become rich.  And if it turns out to be false, and we don't become rich by applying these principles, we can all laugh at ourselves for being such fools.  But we'll never know unless we try.  What do we have to lose?